The Boy's Path #My Eyes See Spring#

Even after so many years, I will often remember that small road in the countryside…

It was a narrow road, winding and long, we couldn't see the end even if we stood and gazed into the distance, it just continued to wind and disappear into the fields and hillsides. On that road that hadn't yet become the broad and flat cement road it is now, I can still vaguely see the silhouettes of four young boys gazing into the distance.

It was a beautiful afternoon many years ago, when the wheat seedlings were greedily absorbing nutrients and sunlight in the spring wind, and the thawing farmland river was flowing slowly, with bees buzzing through fields of rapeseed flowers, the breath of spring quietly spread across the earth. It was full of vitality and springtime beauty. My elder brother, cousin, and nephew, we four set off along that road for an adventure, the distant everything always stirred people's curiosity, making us unconsciously want to explore.

We have a group photo of us four when we were young

We were playing and chasing each other on the uneven road, occasionally discovering a hole in a field ditch and stopping to take a look, imagining what was inside – a hibernating snake or a drowsy hedgehog. Youthful hearts can't resist temptation.

The four of us walked back and forth, turned several bends, climbed over several small hills, that road seemed to have no end, at this time it was already late in the evening, the sun was almost setting, the western sky was hung with a vast expanse of fire clouds. We finally chose to stop and rest on a small hillside, we discussed the distant and the future, and birds flew over our heads. Until my elder brother said it was already late, we had to go home, we reluctantly followed the original road back. In the sunset, the silhouettes of four of us, of varying heights,

It was a very beautiful afternoon, and even now I can't forget that afternoon, because when we were young, we carried few burdens, so we were carefree and without worry. But that beauty didn't continue into our later years. Now, looking back, it's really sigh-worthy.

My elder brother is now a middle-aged man with a fat figure, he makes a solid living, and his wife's life is harmonious, but he has experienced the pain of losing his son. His second brother, my nephew, was born and died shortly after birth because of a disease, which was a great sorrow for him. He spent these years trying to heal this pain, but he couldn't remember the various things he did in his youth, and he felt that the present was the most real and important, so he wouldn't care about the past. Time flows on, and people's hearts change!

My cousin because of the passing of his grandfather, he had a scar, he dropped out of school to work in the countryside, he became obsessed with playing games and made friends with netizens, and eventually, the five of us went to Guangzhou to commit suicide. During the Spring Festival this year, I went to the tomb to pay respects, and the tomb was collapsed and overgrown with weeds. Who remembers that handsome young man, who remembers the stars in his eyes, he was full of spirit and bravely walked forward, but later his life was blank and difficult, which changed his trajectory and ultimately led to his death in a foreign land. Life is long, and people will inevitably get lost!

My nephew was the youngest of our four, but he married early at nineteen. He was married early, so his wife and husband were full of childish quarrels and arguments, which eventually led to their divorce. Now he is still suing his ex-wife for compensation. Roads aren't always straight and smooth; they have curves and turns, and we walk on them, we must respect them. Because we don't know where the road will take us.

I've walked all over the place over the years, along the way I've seen all kinds of beautiful things in life, lush greenery in the forest, clear springs in the mountains, but everyone has their own story. I came to work early, I had to navigate between several relationships, I disappointed many people, and finally I ended up marrying someone through blind dates, and I had a child named Dou Dou. My later marriages also went through twists and turns, but they were hidden and unspoken because I didn't want people to sympathize with me, so I wanted to appear strong. All these changes over the years, the ups and downs, only I know the taste of it best.

Like fish in water, cold and warm are self-known!

When we were young, we liked to read inspirational articles and thought they were all very sensible, so we believed them wholeheartedly. Now I'm more opposed to articles that tell you how to live a good life, because many principles can't be understood, and it's not until I've walked along a bumpy road before I realize that principles are for others, and life is for yourself.

During the Spring Festival, I stood on that small road, gazing into the distance until the evening, and then I returned home in a daze. Things from ten years ago seemed to be just yesterday. The winter sky had hands clasped in prayer. Time has taken away how much of the boy's tears, and there are fallen stars in the wilderness.

Dreaming, the years have passed, we didn't become the people we imagined in that afternoon.

Is today's west wind still fifteen degrees?

Is today's east wind still fifteen degrees?

It is unclear, it is unknown.

I've always had a habit of writing new words to express my feelings, but in the past, I mostly wrote for the sake of creating new words and forcefully expressing my feelings, I couldn't face my inner feelings, I always concealed them half-hidden, and now I finally understand that the real sorrow cannot be written, it's better to drink a cup of wine to dispel it.

People, as long as they are still alive, they must keep moving forward, even if they stumble along the way. All the roads you've walked, all the things you've done, all the books you've read, and all the joys and sorrows you've experienced – will they all be wasted? I think they probably won't, they will return to warm you in the future. I see the spring in my eyes has tears, and my heart is full of warmth, thank you for accompanying me all along this long road!

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