Vancy’s Diary: The Key to Loving Yourself is to Do These Three Things Every Day
Today is February 10, 2020. It's Day 10 of Vancy's daily original article commitment.
Today is a good day, cloudy with rain. As someone who loves winter sunshine, I don't like rainy days. So why is today a good day? Because bad weather can also be beneficial, allowing us to justify staying in bed and warming up, o(∩_∩)o, and conveniently giving ourselves a 'bingbing (marathon watching shows)' reason.
For me, this is an expression of self-love. How important is self-love for women? I want to say that it's extremely important!
I believe many sisters will find the topic of self-love is not a strange one. Because in recent years, everyone has been paying attention to this topic. But there are many misconceptions about what constitutes self-love. So I'll try to share my feelings and thoughts.
Many people understand self-love as the following behaviors:
1, buying beautiful clothes, buying all kinds of things you like.
2, enrolling in various classes to enhance one's personal growth, such as fitness, yoga, cooking, flower arrangement, etc.
3, spending money on travel.
4, striving for advancement in academic or professional pursuits, taking various courses and obtaining various certificates to cultivate oneself internally and externally.
5, equating self-love with simply doing whatever you want.
All of the above may have something to do with self-love, but most do not have anything to do with it. Why? From the perspective of state and result. Does your life's state undergo such a transformation through those you consider to be self-love behaviors? Have you become more relaxed, more authentic, more carefree, more supple, and more elastic; do you better understand and accept your weaknesses, and also better understand and tolerate others' shortcomings; do you dare to pursue what you truly want, and refuse what you don't want; because you dare to be yourself, you live with a greater sense of accomplishment and shine more brightly.
Conversely, no matter how good an event is, if it brings you more pressure, is to prove how good you are, or to get others to recognize you, then you still haven't truly loved yourself.
Here are three key practices of self-love that you should remind yourself to do every day:
1, I allow myself to rest.
We have been taught since childhood that we should have 'productive things to do.' So when a person rests, it's easy to feel guilty. But humans need rest, and rest is an important part of a person's life.
Work is for life. If life only has work and no rest and entertainment, such a life will be boring and monotonous. In the end, such a person will not truly love life.
Therefore, a person who loves themselves needs not to be reminded to work, but to allow themselves to rest properly.
2, I love myself.
No matter what others think of me, I recognize myself. Even if I'm not perfect, even if I make mistakes, even if I fail, I still recognize myself. I must remind myself every day that I've done well enough.
You must first admit that you are good. Self-confidence is a true expression of a person's self-love. Self-love often comes without blaming oneself for anything.
Perhaps some people think guilt and self-reproach are necessary. But guilt doesn't really make people change, it's just a self-forgiveness excuse. Conversely, if a person can often receive appreciation and encouragement, their progress will be faster.
3, I no longer force myself.
Many children are forced by their parents when they were young. Adults are used to thinking that children need to be faster and do more. In the long run, this will form a 'reminder' in the child's heart. 'You have to hurry up!', 'If you don't hurry up, things will get worse!' Many people feel like they have a boss who works 24 hours a day, giving orders at any time. The existence of this 'reminder' makes many people nervous and anxious, not only does it not have the highest efficiency, but it also creates a long-term state of stress. This makes people feel like they are always in a state of panic.