Live a life without seeking approval, without explanations, and without entanglement
Love yourself the most romantic way is to spend your life in the way you like.
I hope that each of us can face the unknown thirty years old with composure, and live a more brilliant self.

01 Don't be arrogant, first love yourself and then love others
I've come across a saying:If he loves you, you don't need to flatter him; if he doesn't love you, you don't need to flatter him either.
In life, we are used to pleasing others, considering others a hundred percent
Novelist Zhang Ailing once wrote such a passage:
“When she saw him, she became very low, very low, down to the dust. But she was happy in her heart, and flowers bloomed from the dust.
Just like burying a foreshadowing, in her love for Hu Lancheng, she was also so low, like this
During Hu Lancheng's escape, Zhang Ailing worried about his safety, inquiring about his whereabouts, and providing him with living expenses through letters, even risking danger to find him
She then befriended a nurse named Zhou Xuan De, and Zhang Ailing tolerated her, but Hu Lancheng didn't change his mind, and later there was Fan Xiu Mei
Zhang Ailing was solitary like herself, sacrificing herself for Hu Lancheng to the dust, and finally he abandoned her without mercy
Not all efforts can be rewarded, and not all love can be reciprocated
Psychology has a term called 'Obedience to the Law'
If you only give to one person without getting the expected response, it will make him take it for granted, and he will increase his demands and exploit your efforts
Always rememberLove seventy percent, need to leave thirty percent to love yourself, then you won't lose to others
Bi Shumin said in 'Wishing You to Embrace the World Warmly'
“Wait for others to love you, rather than strive to love yourself.
If we only focus on giving and pleasing others, we will lose ourselves, and we may lose the respect of others
But if we reserve thirty percent of our love for ourselves, even if no one offers warmth, we can manage our own lives well; even if we are alone, we can be happy and content
At this time, you will find that the things you get are often more than you imagined
Everyone's world, in simple terms, is to see through it, in fact, it is all given by yourself
In this life, you should love yourself well
02 Don't explain, be your most real self In the 'Analects' there is such a story:
A 'special' guest visited Confucius, and his disciple Zifu Gong asked: 'What is the purpose of your visit?'
The guest said, 'I want to ask the time of the year.'
Zifu Gong said, 'This question is simple, you don't need to ask the teacher', so he asked directly, 'How many seasons are there in a year?'
The guest shook his head and argued, 'There are only three seasons in a year, how can there be four?'
Zifu Gong was very shocked, so he insisted on arguing with the guest for a whole morning, but he couldn't distinguish the truth
At this time, Confucius just happened to pass by
The guest quickly grabbed Confucius and asked, 'How many seasons are there in a year?'
Confucius thought for a while and replied, 'There are only three seasons.'
The guest happily left
Zifu Gong was still puzzled, and Confucius explained, 'This person's body is green, obviously a shape changed by grasshoppers. He was born in spring and died in autumn, he has never seen winter. If you argue with him about four seasons, he might argue with you forever.'
Zifu Gong realized it
In life, many people are like Zifu Gong. They are very concerned about the opinions of others, and they want to explain and prove themselves to satisfy everyone
But they will eventually find that everyone has different thinking ways, and you can't make everyone happy
You are kind, others say you are not clever; you are silent, others say you are useless; you are calm, others say you are arrogant; you are lively, others say you are crazy
In life, people are diverse, no matter how good you do, there will always be someone who is not satisfied
Those who understand you don't need you to explain, those who don't understand you, no matter how many explanations, it's useless
So
Never explain yourself to others, because time is a stronger response
03 Don't get entangled, don't lose your life, don't lose yourself
03
“”
“”
“”
