Boundaries are Essential in Kindness!
Written by/Feiyu
According to a famous line from 'The Godfather':
'A heart without boundaries is soft, it only allows the other person to take advantage of you; without principles of kindness, it will only make the other person do whatever they want.'
Your kindness needs boundaries. People are inherently good, but you also need to protect yourself, otherwise others will treat you like a wolf, mercilessly swallowing you up.
You can be a good person, but don't be a pushover.
Some people spend decades helping others, especially their loved ones. But they end up with repeated heartache and disappointment! These painful experiences taught them that kindness can actually hurt you, and it can encourage others to take advantage of you.
It's hard to earn money with your own efforts, but you spend it freely on others, only to receive escalating demands and ultimately, a bitter feud.
When you help someone too much, they become accustomed to it, and sometimes you just can't handle it, but you still obey your inner voice. Kindness turns into silently enduring abuse, leading to a broken relationship – this is called being unappreciated.
People who are always 'good' eventually no one cares about, they treat you as a fool to take advantage of.
Therefore, you should learn to say no, to establish a healthy boundary for yourself!
As the saying goes: 'Kindness can be sharp; it's a kindness that has an edge.' If you take too much in kindness, you'll be cautious when you extend your hand.
We don't really fear giving, we fear giving our hearts and souls, only to receive indifference from others – that's the most painful.
I used to be a pushover, unable to gauge the extent of help, doing anything and everything. Now I understand that when someone relentlessly demands, your continued help just makes them feel you're a fool to exploit, and it's easy to bully you.
People should carry a kind heart, but kindness should have limits.
Feed the dog, and he'll eat your rice; feed the rice, and he'll eat your dog.
I once encountered such a person; I hired someone who knew nothing and couldn't even afford an uniform. I loaned them my uniform – our company uniform cost 580 yuan per set, and colleagues didn't wear them once. They quit, saying they wouldn't need it and planned to sell it for 200 yuan.
She haggled the price down to 150 yuan, and colleagues were angry and gave up. She thought it was okay to wear my free uniform, so she didn't want to buy it. I didn't want to take it back, and she didn't return it, which eventually led to a bad relationship – this is what happens when kindness fills a bottomless pit of desire.
Therefore, there is a limit to everything; don't endlessly pour your good deeds into others' mouths, you also need to leave some for yourself, giving yourself a sense of proportion, which will illuminate your life in a different light.
