I once encountered a topic: What is marriage? Some say marriage is a ceremony, the ring worn on the ring finger, and then there's a thousand-thread-like relationship behind it. Others say marriage is capturing a city, outsiders full of yearning to come in, and those inside are suffocated by the everyday and want to escape. In reality, no one's marriage is a one-time success. To be happier than others, you need to put in far more effort, perhaps a hundred or even a thousand times more. The professor Dai Jianye, a popular lecturer on TikTok, and his wife's enduring love, which many find enviable. However, when they first married, they frequently argued due to differences in lifestyle and even considered divorce, wondering if they had made the wrong choice. Later, Professor Dai began to reflect:
Back then, I wasn't mature enough, I didn't know how to accommodate a woman. As I grew more mature, I realized she wanted to marry me. What was the point of arguing?
Many people, when they argue, instinctively say: If I hadn't married him, I would be very happy now…… But life doesn't have 'ifs' and 'whys'! It's not that there are fewer people naturally compatible, it's that people's ability to manage their relationships is weak. The happiest marriages in the world also have 200 times the desire to divorce and 50 times the urge to kill each other. A writer once said: Eating a variety of grains inevitably brings a touch of worldly dust and smoke. You can't demand that a mortal live like a perfect, flawless saint. In matters of the heart, especially. Truly perfect marriages are two people constantly refining themselves together.
