The Most Comfortable Relationship Between People is Not to Flatter Anyone

Surprisingly, the painting was covered in criticisms.

The painter was astonished and disappointed. He was also puzzled because he thought his work should be appreciated.

Several days later, the painter put out another identical painting, with a new note: ‘Please point out the most beautiful parts of it.’

When the painter returned, the painting was still covered in marks, but the criticized areas had turned into praise.

The painter realized that everyone has a different perspective on the same thing, whether it's beauty or ugliness.

Bi Shu Min said, ‘Our lives are not defined by the approval of others.’

There is no one thing or person that everyone likes.

Instead of wasting your energy trying to live in a way that others like, it’s better to focus on living the way you want to.

‘People who are too ‘considerate’’ live the most tired lives.

Recent college graduate Wang felt a lot of pressure and exhaustion at her relative's workplace. She tried her best to meet all their demands.

She asked her friends, ‘Should I consider leaving or talk to my parents?’ She replied, ‘I can’t disappoint them, I can’t cause them trouble.’

Another friend mentioned that he always found it difficult to say no.

Once a colleague invited him to join a class, even though he had his own plans, he agreed because he didn’t want to hurt the relationship.

Later, he regretted it because he realized he should have said no, but even when he realized this, he still instinctively said, ‘It’s okay, I’m fine.’

‘People who are too ‘considerate’’ are used to suppressing their true emotions. Because they are too considerate, they try to please others; because they are considerate, they always forgive; because they are considerate, they always tolerate and make concessions.

Over time, no one cares about their happiness or sadness, and no one understands their difficulties, and no one comforts their grievances.

They seem to have many friends and stable relationships, but only they know the exhaustion of pleasing others.

The best relationships are those where you don't need to deliberately suppress yourself to please the other person.

There are always such people around us:

They may not be outstanding or popular, but they have a unique charm that makes people want to approach them.

They make you feel comfortable, being with them is like listening to a soothing melody and drinking a rich cup of tea, allowing time to flow peacefully and quietly.

In conversation, no matter how sour, sweet, bitter, or spicy the words are, they calmly respond to everything without causing any conflict.

They are not overly flattering, they don’t try to make others feel comfortable, but their every move makes others instinctively want to be with them.

In a relationship, two people exchange gifts, and both put in effort, rather than feeling one is indebted to the other.

Whether it's family or friends, this is the way to go.

College student Jiang Fangzhou, who was on the show ‘Variety Show’, once admitted, ‘Because I really hope others like me, I became a flattering person.’

Because of the fear of conflict and upsetting others, she often couldn’t express her own principles and bottom line, and became a ‘people-pleasing’ personality, leading to a miserable and difficult life.

This sharing resonated with many friends online, vividly depicting the experience of living in a complex and challenging world.

Jung once said, ‘It is better to be a whole person than a good person.’

Being a good person requires considering everyone around you. But being a whole person allows you to live your true self.

The most comfortable relationship between people is one where you don’t need to flatter anyone.

Do yourself, and let others do themselves, without needing to cater to anyone’s needs.